Friday
I do not want to be working today. I do not want to make someone else’s words better and then feed those words tickertape into the machine (tickertapetime please). Today I want to write. I want to swim in the ocean and wave like a drowning woman. I want to drink martinis in martini shaped glasses with people who would not object if opportunities presented themselves (even if those opportunities never do). I want to write a play. I want to play. I want to doodle time away doodledoodledoodle and never think — that was my only free hour this week and what have I to show for it? Not even clean laundry. I want to have a secret plan about the wedding anniversary only two days away but I do not. I have work to do. I have laundry to do. I have coffee to drink (small graces) and the possibility that someday (not today though) there will be time to doodledoodledoodle.
I can certainly empathise with what you are feeling! Why did I not appreciate more those hours and days I had (before motherhood) when I could lie in bed until I had read the paper, spend time browsing bookshops etc? But hopefully in the (fairly distant) future, our children won’t need us as much and maybe, life won’t be so pressured – in which case we will be able to fully appreciate those hours as they return to us.
I know something you have to show for that hour- your sanity. You are still sane right? I mean, at least you have the ability to appear sane- well except for that last word. Doodledoodledoodle.
Did my misplaced hyphen irritate you.
Sorry.
I hope you find doodle time too.
And maybe if I had more doodle time I would better understand the Frost poem. Still mulling.
Thank you for your kind comments today. Work and everything is going well but I am looking forward to some time to doodledoodledoodle. I raise my martini glass to possible opportunities.
It is your anniversary?
it is hard to be doing
what Has to be done
rather than
what
Wants
to be done…
you are not alone in this…
Have you ever tried making laundry into a game? It can be fun.
Once you get in a laundry zone, the endorphins come. Sometimes working yourself into a cleaning frenzy is awesome. The relaxation that comes afterwords is the best. All the procrastination doodling causes depression…(for me). My pops always said: Nuthin to it but to do it.
Oh it sounds great! I’ll join you in doodling!! Get we bang on something too just to make loud noises???