There should be some juicy quote for this thought but I can’t find one
We are all hidden from one another. We seek to connect, to understand, to know. We crawl towards illusions of understanding and find moments of brilliant, electrifying connection, but in the end, we are all alone. Each of us, alone. This is perhaps a city girl’s perception of the world. I look at the rows of houses, the grids of windows, the lines of cars and in each house, each car is a story, a dozen stories. All these stories, so close to each other and so separate.
In turns this terrifies me, and makes me want to dance. We are all so alike and yet intact, so distinct from one another.
So yes, my children are naturally hidden from me in the same way that my love, Ed, is hidden from me. I like this. I like that these people I love, the people I am closest to, are mysterious still. I like that all our lives long, we can discover those we love.
But there is a difference between this natural mystery and a pulling down of blinds. What I hope for is that my own children never feel the need to shut the doors of their selves to me in order to be who they are.
Are those hand knit sweaters I see?
this is the melancholy that makes life worth living. to think that every one of us is a Great Mystery, and together, we collectively are the Greatest Mystery, is wonderful, and terribly frightening, and the possiblity of becoming stagnant and isolated is there.
sin is often described by transcendentalists as failure to forgive one’s self. and this creates stagnancy.
but the beauty of humanity is just as you describe: eros and agape all at once. we are hidden, like gentle pearls. we shall always be so, except when the lumination strikes our souls at such angles that we cannot hide…then, we are revealed, if only for a moment.
ah, how i love what i know of you.
oh, by the way, are we strangley linked in blog synonymous-ness or something?
I think i’m in the same mood you are in. hmmph.
Beautiful post, beautiful sweaters and of course, beautiful children!
Brilliant, as usual. I’m going to have to see a medical professional about this jealousy thing.
Beautiful post, beautiful children. I realized this week-end that we all have a little mystery(even me) no matter how public we appear.