Comments on: Schooling redux

By: Anonymous

Anonymous — Mon, 18 Dec 2006 12:21:00 +0000

I have one of those square peg kids too! I teach gifted ed also and so many of my students fall into the abyss since the only time they feel appreciated or challenged is in my classroom. Unfortunately (and you can see it in the comments here) too mant public school teachers want students to fit a certain mold and God forbid a student ever break free from that mold.

Best of luck finding a new school for your son. Does the university have a charter school on campus? A lot of colleges have a lab school for the student teachers to participate in and they are often forward thinking/ non-traditional schools. You might have luck with that.

By: misskami

misskami — Sun, 17 Dec 2006 04:49:00 +0000

Ahhh, this is the first post I’ve read from your site and it made me tear up. After several years of infertility treatments, we’ve decided to adopt. After the first several times and I didn’t concieve I thought – “maybe I shouldn’t?”. Adoption has slightly calmed my fear – which has always been that I might have a child I wouldn’t be emotionally equipped to deal with. All this brief description of my internal struggle to say – I so appreciate your honesty. kami_kelson@yahoo.com

By: Carri

Carri — Fri, 15 Dec 2006 04:47:00 +0000

As a homeschooling mommy who loves reading about your wonderful son, I have to say that following your heart is the best course of action. I struggle every day with my choice to keep my kids at home. They have plenty of friends but my daughter is beginning to feel a little lonely. She’s just not connecting with anyone like she is really wanting to right now. I think as parents with so many options we will always be second guessing ourselves. The thing I struggle to remember is that I do have options. I have faith that things will work out beautifully for you.

By: callie

callie — Fri, 15 Dec 2006 01:37:00 +0000

(sorry) colleagues*. dang that spell check. I’m sure he’s not ready for college.

By: callie

callie — Thu, 14 Dec 2006 23:39:00 +0000

Oh, if only they explained that the sleepless nights you would endure as a parent were easiest when all you were worrying about was missed sleep. One of the hardest things we've had to face as parents is coming to the realization that we have to release our children to the scrutiny and sometimes cruelty of the world.
When I was pregnant with our son, one of the early ultrasounds indicated a possible "abnormality". The days between this and the next sonogram stretched endlessly with worry. I sobbed though, not for the needs my child might have- they would be both agonized over and celebrated by my husband and I- but at the sheer thought that the world would not love my child as I would, and the adversity my child would face was really the risk of a broken spirit.
I read once that having a child was like wearing your heart outside of your body. It is that and then some.
So, whatever you decide, decide as the only person who will ever truly advocate for your child. And also, keep in mind that some of the reasons you are such a beautiful and thoughtful person are that you faced adversity.
Also, remember that I am a teacher. And I realize that allowing your child to attend my class is akin to lending me your limb eight hours a day. And I cherish and respect them as much as humanly possible, and know that I am a small but important part of how your child looks at his own reflection. And there are many colleges who feel like this as well.
Much luck, and as always, you have my respect and well wishes. I'll bet that boy is a beauty.

By: charlotte

charlotte — Thu, 14 Dec 2006 19:33:00 +0000

PS Thanks for showing up at Charlotte’s Web!

By: charlotte

charlotte — Thu, 14 Dec 2006 19:32:00 +0000

I had the experience of seeing my children through the world’s eyes today at the doctor’s. They were supposed to be sick, but for some reason were feeling frolicky, and were rolling like puppies on the floor of the waiting room. At home, I would have thought “how cute, look how sweetly they play despite the four-year age gap” but instead I realised that in the eyes of the other mothers they looked like noisy little thugs. Apart from telling them to quieten down a little, I let them frolic and ignored the LOOKS I was getting. I’m sure those German mummies are saying to their husbands tonight that English children are very badly behaved.

I’m sure you’ll find a lovely school for your boy in your new home. Isn’t it strange how children aren’t allowed to be eccentrics but adult eccentrics are celebrated? You’ll find somewhere that celebrates his differentness, I’m sure of it.

By: Anonymous

Anonymous — Thu, 14 Dec 2006 19:03:00 +0000

re: I cannot get so twisted that I see my lovely, funny, eccentric child through the eyes of round-peg people ever ever again.

Thank you for reminding me of this. So true. So true.

By: Anonymous

Anonymous — Thu, 14 Dec 2006 16:59:00 +0000

I don’t have any advice – just understanding. Keith is my child who no one else really gets. He marches to his own beat, he blurts out any idea that enters his head – and they are sometimes amazing and/or baffling, his interests are odd for his age, and his feelings are strong on practically every topic.

He is in 6th grade. Teachers have never understood him – not from the first day of kindergarten. In 3rd grade, they began rotating classrooms – so he has a different teacher for every course. This is good and bad. A few have been patient; most have been the same. Do what we say, down to the tiniest detail, or suffer the consequences. And suffer he does.

I try, when he comes home, to make it a place where he is accepted, admired, adored. We go our own rounds sometimes, but he knows that I believe he is amazing and brilliant – and thank God, my opinion matters more than those teachers’ opinions.

If I had it to do over, I would homeschool – knowing that 7 years into school, he’s still being treated as less than he is. Every day. I’ve just kept hoping, every year, for ONE teacher to “get” him. It hasn’t happened yet. Now I find myself thinking, stupidly, “Maybe in junior high…”

Aaaaagh.

By: Anonymous

Anonymous — Thu, 14 Dec 2006 15:32:00 +0000

Social interaction will undoubtedly provide the best long-term benefit. I feel confident in motherhood and intuition.

Once you move to your new city, undoubtedly, you will improve upon the school environment for your son! Relax…